RIP Scale.

I mentioned a few entries ago, that I hid my scale from myself. I have a very unhealthy relationship with the scale and have a history of solely basing my success on what that number says, I figured if I hid it I wouldn't be tempted to see what it says... I was wrong. I have weighed myself twice, and was unhappy with what I saw after all of my hard work and eating right. Although I KNOW I am doing the right thing, it's hard not to let it get to you when you see little to no movement... 

So this is what I did today. I threw it on my garage floor to break it a little. 

Then I...

Threw it in my disgusting garbage, broken, so there was no way I could turn back. 

I have to admit, it felt liberating! F-U scale! I will NOT allow you to dictate my sucess anymore. I want to feel good, and if that means I don't know how much I have gained/lost through the process, I am ok with that! 

Anyways, I am off to class! Yes, my own college class... I'll write more about that later :) 

Turkey bacon just isn't bacon.

My husband left today to work out of town for this coming week so I made a big breakfast for our family before he left. French toast, scrambled eggs w/ onions, green peppers & tomatoes, and (gulp) turkey bacon. Now, I've substituted turkey meat all over the place and typically can not tell a major difference... that is not the case with bacon. Nothing should be substituted for bacon. Just throwing that out there. It was thin, flat, overly crunchy and seriously lacked flavor. But hey, can't blame a girl for trying!

This weekend was a little tougher for me because we had kids events ALL day long yesterday, which typically equals the dreaded concession stands. This time around, I packed my own healthy snacks to munch on while I sat in the dressing room with 30 dancers, plus other dance moms for 9 hours. Yes you read that right. (insert bottle of wine here...) I left the morning without eating breakfast, I think I honestly just forgot to. I was in such a hurry after getting myself and my daughter ready for her dance show I just spaced it. Well, it's our tradition to stop at Caribou on our way for a coffee for me and a cookies & cream snowdrift for her... Of course we could not break tradition so we stopped and I got myself a latte, her drink and an egg white and turkey bacon breakfast sandwich to the whopping tune of 8 WW points! It was the best choice I could make there, oh well. That was at 9:30am, the next time we got a chance to eat an actual meal was at 4 in-between dance shows so another family and us went to Buffalo Wild Wings for lunch/dinner. By this time I was dying, stomach growling, borderline shakes going on - waited WAY too long to eat. I did have a few snacks throughout the day but I needed real food. I order a Buffalo Chicken Flatbread WITH blue cheese, hey now, don't judge. I am human, and I was freaking starving. Not my best choice by any means, and boy did it cost me. This little flatbread was 26 WW points and the side of blue cheese was 8! Are you kidding me?!?!?!?! Needless to say, I will be working extra hard this upcoming week to make up for it!

Truth be told, it's ok. I didn't beat myself up over a day of poor choices, I am human and if I think I am not going to have splurges I am only setting myself up for failure. I could've made a better choice for sure, but I didn't want to. I wanted to eat it, enjoy it, and I did. But I also tracked it. I owned it. I didn't try to hide it!

Anywho - this week will be a biggie for me. I start a new job tomorrow and I have my first day back in college on Tuesday! EEEEK! It will be crucial for me to stay on track this week because it is my week #3, which has always been when I start to fall off the wagon and stress is hard for me to deal with. So here's to an excellent week! I WILL stay on track, I will do this. I will get past my week 3/4 curse and make it all the way! Wish me luck on my new ventures!

$3.54 well spent! Homemade healthy salad dressing, um yes please!

Today I discovered THIS... Wait for it... 

What is this you ask? A homemade salad dressing bottle WITH recipes and measurements listed on the bottle! Where have you been my whole life? And how did I not know about this before? Best part you ask? It was $3.54 at Target! Hot damn! 

I made a French vinaigrette which by the way was DELICIOUS! I can't wait to try the other ones listed on there! 

Anyways so far so good this week, tracking, yes ma'am, working out, you betcha! After Monday's terrible munchies I quickly got myself in check starting Tuesday :) BOOM. 

Today = can't stop eating.

So I can't fall asleep, I just can't shut my mind off for some reason so I might as well blog right? While my face is covered in a mud mask...

Anywho... I was hungry non stop today. Literally. I felt like a 9 month pregnant lady that is feeding for triplets. I don't know wtf, it was bad. I am pretty sure I know why, but let me lay this out for you so you don't feel so sorry about what you ate today because I am sure the amount of eating I did today will make you feel better about yourself! Lol

Woke up at 5am to say goodbye to the hubs and couldn't fall back to sleep... Woke the kids up at 6 for school and proceeded to eat: 

1 - banana zucchini muffin w/ a little butter (mistake #1 sugary breakfast)

I brought the kids to school and came back home, I was so tired and ended up falling asleep (I mean seriously, who takes a nap at 7:30am?) when I woke up shortly after I was STARVING. I ate a banana. 

I then did my workout (yay!) and took a shower before eating lunch. When I was done I ate a pretty decent size salad w/ cucumbers, carrots, 2 tablespoons of mozzarella cheese, and homemade vinegar/oil dressing. (Mistake #2 no protein) I was still hungry so I ate a Greek yogurt too. 

I did a few things around the house and a couple hours later it was time to get the kids from school, I was hungry again (story of my life) so I made myself a protein smoothie w/ frozen fruit for the road. 

Upon coming home from picking the kids up, I did some laundry and was hungry again. So I ate some cucumbers w/ the same vinegar/oil dressing I used earlier, oh yeah and a handful of baby goldfish crackers. 

For dinner I made roasted carrots w/ green peppers & onions and Parmesan crusted chicken breast, which was delicious! I was more than satisfied after dinner and went about my night. 

At like 8:30 I felt hungry again so I ate a handful of blue tortilla chips and just when I thought I was done for the night I topped it off with 2 dark chocolate dove thingys. 

I get 30 WW points for the day and I ate 35. I mean wtf? That is a ridiculous amount of food! Could it have been way worse though? Um, YES. Although I was starving all day I made some pretty decent choices. Kudos to me! After analyzing what I ate today I know that breakfast and lunch are what screwed me up. I had very little protein and did a workout on a nearly empty stomach. 

What do you do? Tomorrows a new day, and I will start the day much better! Ps... It's going to be like -45 below zero here is Minnesota and school is cancelled for the kids. Brrrrrrrrr! 

Ok I have got to go wash this ish off my face and go to bed. Sweet dreams!! Xoxoxo

Looove me some fruit infused water

I have always loved lemon in my ice water, I mean LOVE it! And let's be honest when I go to fancy hotels or conferences they always have a fun water w/ fruit in it that is delish! But lately I have been seeing more and more pictures being posted on Facebook or Pinterest of these wonderful looking fruit infused water creations, they look amazing and so pretty! 

Well... My mom got me a fruit infused water bottle with the tube in the center so I started trying all sorts of different combinations and am slightly addicted! Thanks mom!! Not only is it helping me get my water intake in for the day, it is seriously so good, and they are filled with all sorts of health benefits that I wasn't even aware of! Who knew!?!?!? I have even been using some of my frozen fruit because I didn't have "fun" fresh kinds on hand at home and it even those work every slick! I did end up taking the little tube thing out of the bottle and just using the water bottle by itself so I could put more fruit in it and it works just fine without it. I say as long as the bottle has some sort of a lid that will prevent you from eating the fruit and just drink the water you will be good to go! 

This one is frozen strawberries w/ cucumbers- one of my favorites for sure 

This one is lemon w/ cucumbers and lime 

Other kinds I have tried so far: 

-Frozen mango w/ pineapple - YUM

-Strawberries w/ lime and/or lemon 

-Cucumbers 

I found tons of recipes for different kinds that I will be trying, here's a few I found on Pinterest

And some benefits that I wanted to point out as well... 

Here's to peeing all day long! Yahoo! Happy water drinking :) 

Tracking

When I first started my journey 4 1/2 years ago, I attended WW meetings every single week and tracked EVERYTHING. And I mean everything. I was so disciplined when it came to tracking, and boy did it work! It was such an eye opener, and really made me think before I ate something. It was a work in progress, and I learned throughout my journey ways to make it easier for myself but in the end I just simply wrote down everything. If I was traveling or away for the weekend, my tracker came with me and I did the best I could to write it all down even if I didn't know the exact points I just wrote it down and did a rough "guesstimate" :) As I started to get closer to my goal, my tracking became a little more relaxed and eventually non-existent after I met my goal. Whenever my weight started to creep up a bit I would just start tracking again and get myself back down to where I wanted to be. 

Throughout the last two years of my hiatus, I dreaded tracking again and avoided it at all costs. I told myself I knew what to do so I didn't need to track. I mean, am I really going to write down everything I am going to eat for the rest of my life? But for someone like me, who is addicted to food, I have to. I just do. It's necessary, and I need to do it for not only tracking what I am eating but to make myself more aware of the different choices I could be making that would be more food for less points...more bang for my buck so to speak. The goal for everyone that tracks is that it teaches you how to eat smarter and eventually it just becomes part of your lifestyle so you don't need to track formally anymore. But sometimes you just aren't ready yet... Like me. 

This past week I tracked everything, and it actually felt kind of refreshing to do it again. My food journal was my partner in crime for a long time, truth be told, I kind of missed it. Anyways, whether it's tracking WW points or just writing down what you are eating it works in different ways! I am currently using the ETools WW app I have on my phone, which is something I NEVER used before. I had a paper tracker and wrote it down by hand but this time around I am trying it electronically since I have my phone with me all the time. Why not? Change can be good! 

Here's a couple snapshots of what it looks like, this is from today's breakfast & lunch...

Total sidebar...

I put my scale in the closet (hidden) so it is not in the bathroom anymore! This was a HUGE step for me, but even though I told myself I didn't want to weigh myself every day and watch the scale ounce by ounce I did it twice without even thinking. So goodbye it went for a while! 

Anyways here's to another good day and hopefully weekend! 

It hurts so good...

Happy New Year!

2015... wow. Hard to believe, I remember growing up when older people used to say how fast time flew by and how annoyed I would get like "yeah, yeah" with a slight eye roll. But it is SO true! My baby is six, SIX, and a oh so sweet kindergartner and my oldest is almost TEN. Holy shit, I have a child that is going to be TEN. How did that happen?

This is going to be a great year!

I am 32 years old, and boy have I made some serious changes in my life over the last few months... I start college again in two weeks, YIKES, after ten years of the same profession I quit my job, am pursuing a completely different career choice and finally working towards finishing my Bachelor's degree! I often say to myself, what am I thinking? But I know in the end, all of the hard work and sacrifice will be totally worth it :) Why now? Why not! Better late than never! I deserve it, I always said once both kids were in school and a little older I would like to go back and finish. Now is the time, it just seemed like everything was falling into place at the right times.

Again, this is going to be a great year! I can feel it, I can...

Anyways, this week (and last week... lord help me) is winter break from school so both of the kids are at home with me and it is absolutely freakin freezing cold outside. Like 2 degrees. I live in Minnesota and it is now January (insert middle finger here). We all have a bit of cabin fever, it's been too cold to really "play" outside the last few days, and we have some serious crud going around in our house. So we've tried to do at least one activity of some sort each day to get us out of the house but not over-do it too much. I think the cabin fever is getting to us, my family thrives on routine, so we've all been on edge. However, I have managed to workout every single morning and track my food each day! Hooray! I usually do really good the first couple of weeks, it's about week 3-4 that gets me. If I can get past week 4-5, then I am on track. That is my starting goal - to make it a whole month of regular movement & tracking. Might not seem like much, but my god, for me it's something and kind of major! I have told myself that I am not going to do any weigh ins for a while, I tend to obsess over the scale and weigh myself every single day and when I don't see changes in the scale I get discouraged and give up. Why do we obsess so much over that damn number? F-U scale. I just want to move more, eat less and track it - see where it takes me. I want to go off how I feel for a bit.

So because I haven't worked out in like 4-5 months, I can hardly move. It takes me about 2 minutes to stand up and kind of adjust so I can move. Once I am up, I am ok, but getting up it brutal. I used to crave this feeling when I was at my peak of fitness because I never got sore anymore, but now - when I pee, it takes me about 3 times as long because I can't get off the toilet afterwards! I know you know what I am talking about! Hahahaha!

Cheers to feeling sore! Have a fantastic day! I will be cleaning my disgusting house today and taking down the Christmas decorations - there just becomes a day when you just need them down like right now. And today is that day! :)